We tend to marvel at the righteous. Yet, many of them don't marvel back.

Moral masochism, the preoccupation with sacrifice and, thus, being good, is often written about when discussing perfectionism but seldom explored is its corollary: moral sadism. Sadism is the pleasure one finds when inflicting pain onto another. Moral sadism is the use of morality to do so. Perfectionists tend to be both moral masochists and moral sadists, often, in addition, experiencing that form of sadism from those close to them, especially in families where perfectionism dominates, while also internalizing it.

Partially due to the rigidity of thought, perfectionists tend to struggle with empathy, perceiving any deviation from an absolute form of morality as an excuse. Therefore, they tend to be hypercritical, offloading some of their self-oriented critical feedback onto others, in part, to relieve themselves of their own attention. On the one hand, moral masochism helps them become superior; on the other, moral sadism helps them feel it.

Perfectionists who've spent years judging others often struggle with addressing their own hurt when others turn the spotlight on them, hurriedly searching for reasons indicating why they haven't actually sinned.........

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