This post is the first in a series. Names have been changed to protect the individuals’ confidentiality.

"Nothing is more deceitful," said Darcy, "than the appearance of humility. It is often only carelessness of opinion, and sometimes an indirect boast." —Jane Austen

Jane felt dazed. Breakfast had quickly escalated from a small disagreement over her husband's lack of follow through to his callous and hurtful remarks: "No wonder your mother abandoned you." "You were single when I met you; nobody could stand you."

His words sliced her. She breathed deeply to stop herself from crying. Dan stared at her menacingly. He told her she needed therapy, and not very nicely. Resisting the urge to reason with him, Jane confessed she no longer loved him and asked for a divorce. She braced for more insults but wished instead for stonewalling. Dan did choose stonewalling and left the apartment.

Over the next few days, Jane oscillated between fear and relief. She looked forward to leaving the man her husband had become after their son’s birth; yet the child abuse statistics in stepfamilies haunted and paralyzed her.

The following weekend, they were eating dinner in silence when Dan said, “I’m sorry, love. Please don't leave me.” He took full accountability for his cruel behavior and, with teary eyes, asked for a chance to "grow past the man he'd become after a childhood of abuse." He even agreed to go to marriage counseling. Jane was grateful for Dan's apparent humility. The couple reached out to several counselors and were scheduled to see one within the month.

When the counselor introduced the couple to Imago exercises, Dan’s willing participation gave Jane hope. She began to become convinced that they’d soon have the........

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