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Kids who shut down around schoolwork often feel stuck, pressured, or internally flooded with anxiety.

The words "Let's slow down and figure this out" can help a child who won't engage in schoolwork to open up.

Approaching kids in a less inflammatory way about schoolwork can reveal hidden struggles parents didn't see.

Many parents contact me, worried, because their child seems to be shutting down when the topic of school comes up. It is heartbreaking for me when I see negative school experiences ruin a child's relationship with learning. Grades slip, and homework may turn into conflict. Teachers who are trying to manage many other classroom responsibilities say the child is distracted, unmotivated, or overwhelmed.

At home, parents hear things like: "I don't care," "This work is stupid," "I forgot," or "I don't want to do it." Sure, on the surface, it can look like laziness or defiance. But, very often, what is really going on is that the child is feeling stuck, pressured, or internally flooded with anxiety.

In these moments, the wrong words can make kids shut down more. But more........

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