No judgment, but have you ever: Set up love traps for your partner to test their commitment? Compulsively checked their phone or location? Demanded constant reassurance about their feelings for you? Begged for validation from other people about whether you are in the right relationship?

There is no certainty in human relationships, but you can build trust and attachment over time by shifting your behaviors. Here's how:

Reassurance-Seeking
Constantly asking for reassurance from your partner or others about the relationship can create a cycle of dependency and insecurity.

Connection: Engage in Honest Communication
Share your feelings and concerns with your partner. Use "I" statements to express your needs without sounding accusatory. For example, "I feel anxious when we don't spend time together. Can we plan a night this week for just us?" This fosters an environment where both partners feel heard and understood, laying the foundation for mutual trust and security. Reflect on moments when your partner has been there for you and express appreciation for those times.

Reassurance-Seeking
Comparing your relationship to other people's relationships or your past relationships can lock you into perpetual doubt.

Connection: Focus on the Positive
John Gottman, marriage researcher, recommends maintaining a positive perspective. Focus on recognizing and appreciating your partner's positive actions and qualities. For example, compliment your partner about something they did that you appreciated, such as, "I loved how you helped me........

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