Let’s face it, teenagers can be difficult. I don’t know any parents who have gotten through their kid’s teenage years without some turmoil. Whether the teen is challenging the parents’ authority, doing poorly in school, or experimenting with substances, teenagers can make parents want to pull their hair out.

It often feels that the efforts we make to help our kids prepare for their futures are often met with arguments, hostility and/or lack of interest. This can be remarkably frustrating and can cause us to get upset and sometimes lose our tempers. What we may not realize is that teenagers often are just posturing their defiance. They are unsure and uncertain about themselves and their futures. Yet, in trying to establish their own identities amidst their insecurities, they often act out inappropriately.

The problem parents face is that they have feelings, too! When their teen is ungrateful, argumentative and just plain unpleasant, it can really irritate parents who feel they are trying their best to help their child. When parents react to their teen’s bad behavior by getting emotionally caught and reactive themselves, then things start to go downhill fast.

When parents lose control and become angry, they may say........

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