Most of us know about the “fight or flight” response, the body’s built-in survival instinct. But that framework leaves out two other common ways the nervous system reacts to stress.

Indeed, psychologists say there are four instinctive reactions that help us understand how people cope with feeling unsafe, overwhelmed or emotionally flooded.

“The ‘four F’s’ – fight, flight, freeze and fawn – refer to automatic nervous system responses to a perceived threat,” Caitlyn Oscarson, a licensed marriage and family therapist, told HuffPost. “These are ingrained responses that can show up in traumatic situations, as well as everyday stress and overwhelm.”

The four stress responses occur when our bodies are in survival mode, so we aren’t using the reasoning centre of our brains. Thus, we may act in ways that don’t seem logical or reflective of our typical values.

“They’re not personality traits, and they’re not conscious choices,” said board-certified psychiatrist and Practical Optimism author Dr. Sue Varma. “They’re automatic survival strategies wired into the brain and body. When someone feels unsafe, overwhelmed or emotionally flooded, the nervous system steps in and tries to protect them the best way it knows how.”

In this sense, your stress response can offer insight into your past experiences and what your nervous system learned over time to keep you emotionally or even physically safe. Most people don’t have just one response, and their automatic reaction might vary based on context. You might fawn at work but freeze at home, for instance.

“All four responses are adaptive,” Varma said. “They develop for a reason, often early in life, and they’re attempts at self-preservation, not signs of weakness. It is interesting, however, to note if a person has a particular go-to response, that is very telling.”

Although you might have one or two default stress responses in different situations, you ultimately want to work on flexibility to gain access to all four because each can serve a purpose at various times. No one stress response is inherently better or worse. The goal is to help your nervous system understand it has options.

“An individual’s stress response is not their personality but rather their nervous system’s autobiography, and like with any life narrative, it can be changed to have more options to address stressful situations,” said Lora Dudley, a licensed clinical social worker with Thriveworks.

Fight, flight, freeze and fawn are not character flaws, and with mindfulness and therapy, you can learn to choose and be more flexible with your responses. Ultimately, awareness is the first step.

“Once you understand your patterns and how they are tied to your nervous system response, it becomes easier to slow down, be compassionate toward yourself........

© HuffPost