Jewish history’s big turning points often start with expulsions. Mass movements of our kind tend to be precipitated by some higher power being like, OK, time to get rid of our Jews, with the general population of whichever locale either acquiescing or egging the government on. The Spanish Inquisition. Medieval banishments. Or, in modern times, frog-in-pot-of-boiling-water moments of antisemitism, like the time Theodor Herzl witnessed the Dreyfus Affair and promptly opened a falafel stand on the Tayelet. (I paraphrase.)

But we are now in the midst of something unprecedented: there are two waves of Jewish migration (or, more accurately, migration narratives; getting to this) underway, but in opposite directions, across the very same national border. Two groups of Jews—Canada-bound American Jews, and U.S.-bound Canadian ones—each presented as fleeing to the other place.

First there were the American Jews (all three of them, if that) fleeing Trump’s regime on account of it being a bit too gung-ho in its fight against antisemitism, in ways that are unpleasant generally and may backfire on Jews specifically.

Then a scant three months later, they’re followed by the Canadians who saw the re-election of the Liberals as a sign that Canada will never take its antisemitism problem seriously. By “the Canadians” I mean pro-Israel media personality Dahlia Kurtz (yes, the same Dahlia Kurtz who misinterpreted a book by Netanyahu in a bookstore display as anti-Israel propaganda). On X, she captioned a video of an Israeli-flag-involving motorcade as follows: “It’s official. I’m moving to Florida. I am not safe in Canada. And this is how Florida appreciates Jews — and humanity. I am meeting with immigration lawyers tomorrow. I am not kidding. Also — this will make my fight for Western civilization stronger than ever.”

I have so many thoughts. One is that if you want to see an Israeli flag coming out of a car, you don’t actually have to leave Canada. You can wait at a Wychwood Barns-area bus stop and one may pass by, but still no bus in sight. (I speak from recent experience.) Another is that “I’m moving to Florida….this will make my fight for Western civilization stronger than ever” is art, and needs to be put in a museum.

Then there’s right-wing Toronto-based (or, sometimes-Toronto-based) commentator

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